One of my favourite things to do is stare at pictures of Rob and drool to read what pervs people google to find RAoR. It never EVER fails to make me laugh, squirm and get a wee bit freaked out LOL. I really really really need a giggle today so let’s check out what the freaks fans have been searching for online.
Crazy Shizz that’s been Googled
disheveled chicken – is that you “Robert” *snicker*
My kinda disheveled chicken!
More after the stroke and pull…
robert pattinson biting his lip – please sir may I have some more??? humina
robert pattinson pants – umm huh? Did you mean Robert Pattinson out of his pants?
jizztyping - you’re in the right place for this. Is that you Rob?? Did you read my letter & google jizztyping LOL
robert pattinson slow down – slow, yes do it slowly *poof*
robbessed - dood if you can’t spell it, you’re really NOT Robsessed!
...and what was I saying? Holy Hell batman!
zac efron shirtless – Leave, leave now! Clearly you’re in the wrong place yet again.
robert pattinson naughty – OMG I totally f*cking hope he’s naughty! and naughty a lot.
be your beautiful best - yea so I think maybe you were looking for like Suzanne Somers website or something…
deep hand porn – WTF? Is this like spaghetti sex?
“hot virgin” - virgin and RAoR…me thinks NOT *snort*
"sooo toniiie weere breein youuu..." Luv DrunkRob
robert pattinson drunk beer – yes I think he may have once or twice *wink*
foreplay - I consider Rob to be THE BEST foreplay there is!
roberts pattinson belt - Belts on Rob are not tolerated here at RAoR…not at all.
dirty smutty stories – why yes...click here
handcuffed girl bent over a car – hmm Tattward maybe *snicker*
twismut addiction – if there’s a cure or a 12 step program…then I want no part of that!
Oh Sweet Tattward! My kitten purrs for you!
edward cullen purple – um purple what…mind in gutter!
taylor lautner desktop wallpaper – Random Acts of Tater…not likely
purchase robert pattinson panties – someone wants Rob’s lips on their kitten *giggle* get in line bitches!
sam bradley fan encounter – Sam, is that you again? LOL
rob pattinson bulge – alright which one of you was this *snicker* you are home
robert that jaw – no last name and they still end up here…luvs it!
The.Jaw.
rob pattinson naked – DED at the mere thought.
the price is right name tag – WTF?
pattinson sexy just a girl – Googling Rob, sexy plus me = UberWin! LOL
low-riding freeball - Hella Yea! You are in the right place for that.
robert pattinson wears socks – Seriously, sock fetish WTF?
taylor lautner erection – oh no you di-iint! *shudders, looks around for Chris Hansen*
Have I mentioned how excited I am to see this moving?
wet hair bald – say what?
raor robert – I love how our “Robert” is like a famous weblebrity and he gets googled. LOL Come back “Robert”. Stop stuffin’ that turkey and come visit your PattinH00rs!
Ahem, Love Tatward!
OMG!!!! I love them, DS!!! And hell to the yeah, RM!!! Please, tag me in!!! Which do you want first Robby or Jacky?
bloody hell i have been incapacitated for days and didnt realise how much i missed coming on here til i just now logged on,JAG roflmao checking for chris hansen that made me pmsl i caught a bit of predator raw last night whilst channel hopping.
I’ll take Jacky to get warmed up and then go ahead and seal the deal with Robby.
What about you peeler?
“robert pattinson slow down-yes, do it slowly*poof*”
uh..*poof* and UNGH!!!
we need a nice, SLOW gif for that!!
OMG dreamysim, I looove that Tattward one, and the RobBoner one…tag me in too, PLEASE!!
Funny as shit JAG! Love it! Also love the picture with the girl giving the bird, his face, lmfao!
Hope you all have a great Thanksgiving holiday! TOTES gonna miss you all for the next few days! I’ll be devoting my time to my RL friends & family but I’ll be thinking of my e-besties while I’m away!
OMG! OMG! OMG! Does anyone remember my random Rob lookalike encounter I had at Target a few weeks ago? Well, hold onto your panites ladies!! He’s a mechanic and he works at the local Firestone!!!!
Long story short, took Mr. P’s car in for brakes and when I went to pick it up my hottie was there!!! He immediately recognized me and began chatting me up as he rang up the bill! I began jizzstuttering at him and blurted out that I would like to take his picture and put it up on our blog! He asked “why?” and I responded that he had a little Robert Pattinson vibe working for him! He asked me, “who’s Robert Pattinson?” I told him he was in Twilight. He then leaned down on the counter looked me in the eyes and said, “Oh, Edward. I could’ve played him a lot better.” And then he winked at me! My mouth snapped shut (as it had been hanging open) and I swallowed so loudly that I know he had to hear it!!!!! Needless to say I made an appointment on Friday to get tires for my mini-van and I don’t really even need them! I’m thinking of trashing my car so I can have an excuse to have some work done on it! My stomach is still doing flips and my hands are shaking as I type this!!! WOW, just WOW!!! I think I need a Valium now!!!!!
UHHH Picture please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Will try for one on Friday, if he consents to it! Maybe I could stealthily use my phone and get one!!!
Did I mention he was scruffy, had messy hair, and when he walked in he was wearing a black leather motorcycle jacket? Uh, yeah!!!!! I’m planning out my wardrobe choices for Friday!!! I want to look my best for my Rob stand-in!!!
Come on 1peeler, we need to see a picture! Resort to begging if you have to!LOL!
Holy shit! Wish my Firestone guys were as hot and flirty as him!
I will look my Cougar “I know you want me” best on Friday and see if I can dazzle him!!! If not, I’ll just sneak a quick pic with my phone!!
@blackrose – was totes shocked!! Usually the Firestone guys are middle-aged, paunchy, average Joes! When he walked in I felt my cheeks flush and a smile started forming around the corners of my mouth! I actually had to stifle the giggle that was starting in my throat! I’m definitely filing this guy away in my “spank bank” for later!!! I still can’t believe I told him I wanted to take his picture!!!! I am a lunatic/stalker in the making, for sure!!!!!
1peeler, don’t know if someone said it….but I think you should DEFINITELY get your tires “ROTATED”. ahem. Maybe LUBE up your chassis. lol “TEST” your brakes. CHECK YOUR OIL WITH HIS BIG DIPSTICK!!!! Fill up your WATER bottle! LOL Squeegee your WINDSHIELD. ahem…..how many other car sexual innuendos can we come up with?
HEHEHHEHHEHEHHEHh my my my…..I think your car will need A LOT of new tires. Make sure you get the tire guarantee and just keep driving over nails so you have to keep going back.
As Rob would say it to you 1Peeler….>NAUGHTY NAUGHTY……
hahhahahhahhahahah
Funny story girl…..
Maybe you should have him put “YOU” up on the “LIFT”….and check all over your underside just to be sure YOU are operating at full capacity. He MIGHT even need to “change your OIL”……or “TIGHTEN” your screws….or squeeze your gaskets, or check ALL your hoses for OPENINGS……and we may have to WORK REALLY HARD to set your “SHOCK ABSORBERS” at their peak performance which means he may need to HUMP up and down and up and down and up and down on your “car” to make sure it bounces back correctly from his HUMPING.
lol….I’m enjoying this….anybody else care to make some sexual car repair innuendos for 1peeler to ponder? LOL
Make sure you wear YOUR black leather jacket friday and heels with sexy jeans too…..let your hair go messy and look “CASUAL” but in a “COUGAR GONE WILD” kind of look. Not too fussy, or dressed up, but definitely LOOSELY relaxed and “wind blown” as if you were just out for a drive with the windows down and some blues playin and you felt compelled to come in and GET CHECKED OUT……by a PROFESSIONAL REPAIR-MANNNNNNN!!!!!!
hahahhahahahahhahhhaa
Get the hook. Sorry, it’s too easy…..that guy knows he’s got it, so give it back to him as good as he throws out and be sarcastically flirty with him and yet in a way he knows he’s NOT going to get it….tease……and then walk OUT ass swaying and aloof. LOL LOVE IT!
COUGARS CAN FLIRT without getting into trouble….you don’t have to follow through…but that’s too easy ….you gotta have some fun girlfriend! DO IT!
OK, I’m sorry….my mind got carried away….nice fantasy though, huh? LOL
We cougars need to get out more. LOL
But to run upon a Rob look a like….I don’t think I could breathe either.
Sorry I teased, it was just to funny and my mind went with it into innuendo hell. Not even funny really, but I AM LAUGHING SO HARD……at least I can make myself laugh any way……
I still think you should flirt and then walk out head held high and proud.
You still got it GIRL!
@Debbo – you can do no wrong in my eyes!! I loved your suggestions and I will certainly try to be as casually smexy as I can!!! I’d like to think I still got it, but two kids later, and too many years may be puttting a dent in my mojo. It’s more like momjo now! But you should have seen his jaw!!! All covered in scruff and chiseled!! I’m surprised I didn’t melt into a little Peeler puddle!
F*ck me this reads better than fanfic!
“momjo”…hahahhahahhahahaa
go peeler!
1peeler,
Good luck friday!!! And make sure you have an answer when he asks you why you ran out of Target the other day….
Oh and:
MAKE. A. PICTURE.
Thanks
“I’m definitely filing this guy away in my “spank-bank” for later.” 1Peeler LMAO!
I wish I’d have an encounter with a Rob look a like …. f*ck I must be losing it…. Jag is right this reads better than fanfic!
1Peeler…. yes, work that MOMJO!!
Love4rob4debbo, ROFLMAO
“CHECK YOUR OIL WITH HIS BIG DIPSTICK” I think you said it all.
Maybe after he’s done with the lube job he’ll be UP for a hand job! *snicker*
hey…love4rob4debbo….I guess I don’t have to tell you it was me music4debbo. LOL
I was on my desktop computer since I was typing gig contracts on it and damned if I didn’t see my OLD nickname was there. lol
Sorry….
I guess you all knew it was me….LOL….
I love the leaning down on the counter part! Gah! And he winked! Double Gah! Wonderful! And now thinking about his hands. Thanks 1peeler!
OMG! Work it Peeler, you just give him that f*&k me stare on Friday you here me girl!
Im picturing Tattward with Bella on the hood bangin away…fuck thats hot
@MR – he was tall and leonine, like Rob! And I did casually check out his hands! A little dirty, from working, but long fingers!! Remind you of anyone!!! I’m going to need a sedative and some liquid courage before getting my car on Friday!!! His hair was a disarray of messy black spikes. Not as lite as Rob’s but hot none the less!
I was totally thinking about hands because of robzilla’s encounter with Real Rob and her fantastic touching of the hand. Soft and clean with musician fingernails. And then I thought of Robchanic and how his hands must be the opposite and how that was just as f**khawt. And the winking. My gah. It is as if you are living fanfic in real life! Crazy! A thousand ways jealous!
That works for me, baby! I’ll break in Robby for you! And then I can wear Jacky out!!!
Hey, I’ll break them both in at the same time!
Kinky!! I like where your head is at!!!!
robert pattinson naughty – “OMG! I totally f*cking hope he’s naughty! and naughty a lot.”
Mmm yea, he’s naughty… VF pic #7…
you know what he’s saying with his eyes….
“come here baby I’ve got something STIFF for you right under here …”
http://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/features/2009/12/robert-pattinson-outtakes-D-200912#slide=7
deep hand porn – whatever do they mean?
LOL
I wonder if Rob will look like this while eating his corn tomorrow… he’s so f*ckhawt eating corn!
This pic of Rob will be in my head tomorrow …. corn porn!! Love it!!
http://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/features/2009/12/robert-pattinson-outtakes-D-200912#slide=3
Rob’s given us so much this month and since I know I won’t say this OUT LOUD at the Thanksgiving table tomorrow with my family I’ll say it here … I’m so thankful for Robvember it’s just been the best month ever!!
Happy Robsgiving Ladies!
I’m thankful for “ROB’S *MEMBER*” too……lol
ok ok ok ok….going off to read fan fic……I’m out of control again. HAHAHAHA
Ha I’m reading way to much fan fic. My brain is in over drive with anything smut!!!! I have lost track on how many stories I have read since Sept 09 when I discovered this world. Maybe 50 or more I don’t know. My poor kids I think are feeling neglected cus my phone is in my hands read all the time. My 3 year old now goes (what you doing mommy playing game) every time she see’s it in my hand. It’s sad really but I am Robsessed and can’t help it. Rob controls me now
Man I wish that really were true He can do what ever he wants to me MMMMMMMM
Robsexme, I agree that his eyes are saying “come here baby I’ve got something STIFF for you right under here …” because it looks like he’s holding it in this one:
http://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/features/2009/12/robert-pattinson-outtakes-D-200912#slide=8
I KNOW somebody posted this a day or two ago, but it’s just SO DAMNED FUNNY and it fits what we all want to hope Rob is like in real life: funny and playful and adorkable and self deprecating. GOD I love this video. After all the serious interviews, it’s great to see the playful side of Rob come out to be goofy. THAT is a big reason we love him so….adorkable Rob for the WIN!
Yeah debbo, I posted that the other day because I thought he was sooo adorkable! I love how she tells him he’s just meant to look hot, like he’s not doing that already!
SRL,
Well, he’s so flirty and cute and playful in that clip I can barely keep myself from giggling like a freaking college freshman. LOL DAMN that man is sooooooo sooo cute he just breaks ALL our hearts and wrings out our panties and blows them dry and puts them back on us before we even know what’s hit us and he says he’s SHY? Oh fuck, Rob…if that’s SHY flirting, then if you got aggressive, you’d need a busload of bodyguards to keep us all away…..hehehehhee
He’s so cute in that video I just want to tickle him till he’s roaringly giggling and then I want to cover his entire face with kisses. . Sorry….he is just too damned charming and cute in this video.LOL I can’t handle it..I’m MELTINGGGGGG!!!! LOL
OMG you guys make me laugh so hard. JAG, love when you do these. There are some crazies out there. LMAO at Random Acts of Tater- not likely for sure!!!
Happy Thanksgiving to everyone who celebrates it!!!
My Fellow Pervy Angels:
As I kneel down before St. Mattress I confess that I did google “rob pattinson bulge” in a desperate attempt to quickly recover our stained glass window of rob crotch shots (but for some reason I couldn’t think of rob crotch). I was arguing with my friend who said because of our Rob’s heritage there is no way he is packing heat…I of course had to defend his honor.
Anywho I won that argument.
In honor of Thanksgiving I am thankful to all of you for just being so damn fantastic, for JAG doing everything you do and making this a safe and fun place to perv out when no one else I know gets it, and of course for Rob-You are so beautiful it actually hurts me a bit. The fact that you don’t agree with us, make you all the more so. Thank you for sharing yourself with us!
WTF does Rob’s heritage have to do with what he’s “packing”? Was your friend trying to imply that British men are lacking in certain areas? Well speaking from experience, I would definitely have to disagree!
Check the big pics out….
http://www.robsessedpattinson.com/2009/11/robsessed-nip-vestigates-robwards-wonky.html
I could give a rats ass about “mipple gate”…..but the CLOSEUPS of his torso and “V” in this larger size is a WIN WIN for all of us.
I know it’s been out, but I have had to ogle this largest picture many times since…..anybody else had this need to study the picture THOROUGHLY?
LOL
I totally noticed something was wrong with his “mipple” when I saw it on the big screen, but when I asked everybody I was with if they noticed, they all said it looked fine to them, so I thought it was just my imagination. But now I know that there was actually something wrong, and I wasn’t just imagining it!
Rob went out for SUSHI on November 22nd in NYC, I see…..
I guess that means: “Rob must LIKE IT… *RAW*”
thud
I don’t know how many more new pics I can stand…
http://thinkingofrob.com/?p=28977
I.AM.SO.F*CKING.DIED….
OH UNGH
DED ——–>
drizl…thanks for that one.
slurppppppppppp. Rob looks so great in leather.
oh myyyyyyyy How does he do that? This shy man becomes a sex beast on cue. He sure knows how to make the most of what he’s got, that’s for sure….
gahhhhhh
I’ve started reading too damned many fan fics at once again. Now today I’m reading: “His personal Assistant”. ahem. I’m in that kind of mood again I guess. Can’t you tell? HAHHAHAHHAHHAH
I know you all have read that story….way ahead of me but here’s the link any way and fucking YES….I’m finally reading one that’s COMPLETE. I feel like I’ve been waiting to exhale while reading all of the other ones….
Here’s “His Personal Assistant” fan fic link…..I like it and it’s LONG story.
LONG IS GOOD. LOL Thick books are good too……OH CUT THAT OUT!
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4992721/1/His_Personal_Assistant
I’m out…..
I haven’t read that one yet…thanxs for the link. debbo…*runs off drooling to start another story*
God I just saw that at Robsessed….hes like ‘well come on get your tits out what are you waiting for in that picture’
OMG IGD, I must have thought the same thing because when I looked at that pic I had a sudden urge to take my top off!
thatswhathesaid
Love the “robert that jaw” search…too perfect for words!
I hope the purple Google search refers to me, Mrs Aubergine!!! I wouldn’t mind being googled by anything Rob had that was purple either
Hey LYNDA,
How about picturing THIS picture as the “Edward” in “Master of the Universe”?
http://www.robertpattinsonsource.org/gallery/displayimage.php?album=600&pos=32
Since I’m just now starting “His Personal Assistant”, I don’t know that character well, but I THINK I’m going to picture THIS photo as the “Edward” in “His Personal Assistant”.
I want him in business attire, but not as cold as some of them…..I’m guessing a bit stoic, business-like polite, but with hidden desires just below the surface….
http://www.robertpattinsonsource.org/gallery/displayimage.php?album=600&pos=63
OMG debbo, that first one is definitely how I picture MotU “Edward”, and I just started reading HPA last night, and that second pic reminds me of that “Edward” too!
well, that’s what you get when I read the Arrangement…Run to read it! I promise:its HAWD!
Is it sick and twisted that I’m bummed that tomorrow is Thanksgiving because I will be unable to log onto RAOR?? Maybe.. but I don’t care!
HAPPY THANKSGIVING LADIES!
I’m thankful for Rob’s long fingers.
I’m thankful for the Robanana nutmuffin jeans.
I’m oh so thankful for Rob’s fuckme stare.
I’m thankful for all the new pics we have been seeing.
I’m thankful for you JAG! My Robporn dealer!
And I’m thankful for all of you ladies for helping me feel normal in my rabid quest for all things Rob!
DW, we’re here to help each other feel normal in our rabid quest!
Ok so I’ve been googling random things to see where I end up, and I was a little surprised that “The Hobo” didn’t lead me here, but “cougar cord” did! What good is a cougar cord without The Hobo?
hehehehhehe You’re right. Batteries suck any way….you just get the little “fucker” in the right spot and he stops buzzing hard and just sort of twitches. LOL A lot like real life? HAHAHHAHAHAAHHHA OK, TIME TO GO….hahahahaha.
You do know that you will be able to shoot a freaking cannon through here tomorrow and you won’t hit anyone, right? Maybe the brits will be on I hope. But the yanks will be stuffing their faces with turkey and trying to deal with the passive aggressive family shit we were all talking about earlier.
And me? I already did the family deed…..it’s Swanson’s turkey tv dinner for me and a good fan fic and a 12 pack of corona.
HAPPY ROBSGIVING PattinPervs!
HAPPY THANKSGIVING WITH KRISTEN….ROB honey!
You made us all so happy this month. Go have some fun yourself…..
Just don’t stuff it too deeply..uhh..errr (mind in gutter)…..oh never mind….go ahead….SHUTTING UP NOW.
I’m gonna finish up “His personal Assistant” and “The blessing and the curse” fan fics before my gigs this weekend. I start reading and the entire freaking night or day passes…..jeesh. So, slap me when Friday comes, ok?
I’m off to fantasy land with Rob and Edward…..
Thanks Debbo, thinking of Rob sitting around the Thanksgiving table with Kristen and her family, and maybe even his family if they’re still here, warms the COCKles of my heart. So cute. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
Love that Tattward Desktop! I adore that guy!
Hello beautiful PattinAngelz! Happy (almost) Thanksgiving! Been in the hospital (again) since late last night, my health took a slight turn for the worse, but thankfully they let me come home tonight! I just wanted to tell you all that I’m so thankful that I found such a wonderful group of ladies that keep me smiling every day! You all really are special, each in your own way, and even though we’ve never met in RL, I consider alot of you as friends. I wake up to you PattinAngelz every morning, and some of you are the last people that hear from me before bed at night. I guess what I’m trying to say is…I <3 you guys alot! Happy Turkey Day!!
Just think…If the Indians had given the Pilgrim fathers a donkey instead of a turkey, we'd all be getting some ass for Thanksgiving!!
xoxoxo
glad your back home and hope you feel better.
the pilgrim donkey is a win!
i’ve decided that this year i am grateful for many things, but mostly for you ladies. i almost feel normal around here! i’m also grateful for clair and richard doing such a fine job raising their family. nobody’s perfect, but they did a damn good thing by their kids. rob’s a f-king dream come true. he handles himself wonderfully, he is humble, intelligent and funny.
happy thanksgiving all
LRAD-glad to hear they let you come home for the big turkey day. Even though your health may be on a down swing, at least you still have the energy to check in here and do a little pervin’. I hope you feel better soon.
Love to all you Angels,JAG, and Rob.
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